Review: Observe & Report

A Warner Brothers release 2009

Written & Directed by Jody Hill

Bi-polar mall security guard Ronnie Barnhardt is called into action to stop a flasher from turning shopper's paradise into his personal peep show. But when Barnhardt can't bring the culprit to justice, a surly police detective is recruited to close the case.



After the delirious high that was Eastbound & Down, I had much hope for this comedy helmed by Eastbound co-creator Jody Hill. Mr. Hill, it seems, has a penchant for mining foul-mouthed, aggressive, unlikeable characters for comedy gold. Unfortunately the schtick is too thin here. Hill's script doesn't push far enough, and Seth Rogan is terribly miscast as the bi-polar, pill popping mall cop. Rogan is too jovial and affable to make the deranged, obsessive personality of his character come to life. And since most, if not all of the film rests on his shoulders, it falls flat in the end.

Supporting actors Ray Liotta and Anna Faris are given little to work with; in fact, their presence barely registers. Sadly, most of the film suffers from this half-assed feel -- characters feel more like sketches, and the plot meanders without much story supporting it. The events of the film sort of just happen, there's no rhyme or reason to it. Through lines are set up and then left sitting for a while until they either resolve themselves or are forgotten. Others simply barely exist to begin with, like a feud between Ronnie and an Arab store worker that is basically comprised of a bunch of Fuck you!'s back and forth.

Ronnie's personality troubles are glossed over with the blanket "bi-polar" explanation, except nothing about what Ronnie says or does is particularly emblematic of someone actually suffering from bi-polar disorder. This was particularly upsetting to me; it seems to be a recent trend in films to use bi-polar disorder as an excuse for a character's odd or aggressive behavior. Anyone who acts out of tune in a film is suddenly a "bi-polar" character, regardless of the accuracy of the representation. Someone needs to call bullshit on this: bi-polar disorder is real, and to use it simply as an excuse to create batshit aggressive characters is unacceptable. There's a way to constructively explore bi-polar disorder and it's affects on people, even through comedy, but so far it's only been approached as a blank justification for petty behavior, and I ain't buying.

But forget the bi-polar thing: many critics and outspoken individuals have been up in arms about a scene in which Rogan's character is having sex with a seemingly unconscious Anna Faris, only to hear her cry out "I didn't tell you to stop, mother fucker!" when he begins to second guess his actions. "Date rape!" they cried. "Inappropriate! Too far!" Frankly, I think that's also bullshit; the joke didn't go far enough. It would have been funnier if they had taken that line out. You can't push a joke that far, only to pull it back at the end. It sucks the wind right out of the sails. Likewise, there's nothing suggestive in the scene that it promotes date rape or paints it in a positive light. That scene to me embodies the entire problem of the movie: Jody Hill can't seem to decide if he's going for a caustic, aggressively dark tone or Apatow-style slapstick raunch. He ends up with neither.

Observe & Report is a film that has a lot of ideas working underneath it but ends up with few of them making it onto the screen. It's a shame. The film suffers from so many tonal shifts and such a lack of breadth that it comes across as a faint blip. Hopefully they're just saving all the goods for Eastbound Season 2.

Revisit: California Split

A Columbia Pictures release 1974

Directed by Robert Altman

Written by Joseph Walsh

A down on his luck gambler partners with free spirit on a winning streak, but finds himself deep in debt. As a final act of desperation, he pawns most of his possessions and heads to Reno for the poker game of a lifetime.



Elliot Gould and George Segal shine in this affable comedy-drama about gambling addiction. The two make a great on screen pair, with Gould playing the fast-talking, easy, sleazy know-it-all against Segal's excitable but straight laced persona. Add to the mix Altman's meandering, multi-layered audio, long takes and tracking shots -- a perfect match for the film's loud, chaotic casino settings -- and you get a pretty unique buddy picture.

The story is pretty simple: an amateur gambler meets another and find they make perfectly profitable partners. Soon enough the pairing goes sour and the two must part ways. While Gould pretty much sticks to what he does best (re: wisecracks), Segal gets to stretch his chops a bit once he gets in too deep. The film doesn't really aim to make any poignant commentary -- one scene between a mournful Segal and a loud, foul-mouthed female alcoholic seems to make a statement on the blind nature of addiction -- but it does do some interesting things to the buddy picture, namely in the fall-out ending.

While not one of Altman's landmark pictures, California Split exhibits much of his trademark style and motifs at a more palatable pace for broader audiences. If you're new to Altman, this isn't a bad place to start. I'd recommend it for the Gould & Segal pairing as well.

Revisit: Baby Doll

A Warner Brother's film 1956

Directed by Elia Kazan

Written by Tennessee Williams

Steamy tale of two Southern rivals and a sensuous 19-year-old virgin.



The second film pairing director Kazan with writer Tennessee Williams brought much controversy upon its release in 1956. Francis Cardinal Spellman condemned the film in a stunning attack from the pulpit of St. Patrick's Cathedral two days before the film opened, saying that the film had been "responsibly judged to be evil in concept" and was certain that it would "exert an immoral and corrupting influence on those who see it", and exhorted all Catholics to refrain from patronizing the film "under pain of sin". Cardinal Spellman's condemnation of the film led to the Legion of Decency's first-ever nationwide boycott of an American-made film produced by a major studio. All over the country, almost 20 million Catholics protested the film and picketed theaters that showed it. The Catholic boycott nearly killed the film; it was cancelled by 77% of theaters scheduled to show it, and it only made a meager $600,000 at the box office. The film was also condemned by Time Magazine, which called it the dirtiest American-made motion picture that had ever been legally exhibited.

Despite all the fuss, the Production Code Administration gave it a seal of approval, (which in many ways led to the PCA drifting farther and farther away from its traditional guidelines until it was replaced by the MPAA ratings system in 1968), and Baby Doll was nominated for four Oscars, included Best Adapted Screenplay and Best Actress for Carroll Baker.

By today's standards the film is a little less shocking, but its straight-forward approach to sex and violence still stings. Miss Baker struts around in a slip while Karl Malden's ineffectual male dishes innuendo after innuendo before Eli Wallach (in his first screen role) can swoop in and squeeze himself uncomfortably between the two. The acting is top-notch, and the tension starts on high and simply mounts with each progressive scene. A surprising amount of humor is wrung out as well; for all the seriousness going on, the film ultimately shapes itself as a sexual farce. The delta setting, including a dilapidated mansion, is gorgeously portrayed in detailed black and white.

Baby Doll is one of Kazan's forgotten masterpieces, a sort of sick sibling of Streetcar. Worth hunting down.

Revisit: Going Overboard

A Trimark release 1989

Directed by Valerie Breiman

Written by Valerie Breiman & Scott LaRose & Adam Sandler

A struggling young comedian takes a menial job on a cruise ship where he hopes for his big chance to make it in the world of cruise ship comedy.



Going Overboard, Adam Sandler's first feature film, rests comfortably at #71 on IMDB's Bottom 100 list. It's the kind of film you'd find on the turn-style rack at your local supermarket - forgotten. Let's hope it stays that way.

Going Overboard is terribly humorless. It strains to wring laughs out of mean-spirited characters, a lame-duck plot, and piss poor production values. Of course some of the quality issues have to be forgiven - director Valerie Breiman made the film on a shoe-string budget while on a cruise - but it doesn't help when the script is an unfunny travesty to begin with. Sandler leans on the usual angry man-child schtick, though not quite as refined. The rest of the cast adds nothing. The result is a film that feels like a bunch of slapdash ideas with little comedic merit. Avoid at all costs.

Revisit: Memoirs of an Invisible Man

A Warner Brothers film 1992

Directed by John Carpenter

Written by Robert Collector, Dana Olsen & William Goldman

Based on the book by H.F. Saint

After a freak accident, an invisible yuppie runs from a treacherous CIA official while trying to cope with his new life.



Horror master John Carpenter teams up with Chevy Chase in this bizarre effects-pushing adaptation of H.F. Saint's famous novel. Not quite a comedy (as Chase's presence would imply), not quite a horror film, and yet not quite a thriller, Memoirs is a bit of everything but not enough of anything. A fun film, but a weird one, it's not surprising audiences didn't connect with it during it's 1992 theatrical run. The tone is simply too scattered, and Chase too uncouth and indifferent a performer to keep it centered. I've always appreciated Chase's nonchalant style, but it feels really out of place here. Carpenter surrounds Chase with a bevy of quality supporting actors, but Sam Neil seems to be trying way too hard (it's almost like he's in a different movie), Darryl Hannah is just kind of there, and Michael McKean gets nothing to work with. The real highlight (at the time) must have been the invisible effects from Industrial Light & Magic. One year before Jurassic Park blew everyone's minds, ILM was tinkering with mixing CGI and practical effects on this film. Watch only if you're a fan of those involved, or have nothing better to do.

Revisit: Kindergarten Cop

A Universal Pictures release 1990

Directed by Ivan Reitman

Written by Murray Salem, Herschel Weingrod & Timothy Harris

A police officer goes undercover as a kindergarten teacher to track down the wife and child of a ruthless drug lord.



This 1990 comedy is endlessly quotable, thanks to counter-programming Arnold Schwarzenegger's over-the-top action persona with a group of sharp-tongued little kids. Like many of Arnold's films the plot verges on completely ridiculous, and serves a fine helping of subverted genre cliches, including a crazed mother/son crime combo that make the Bates family look normal. A mild diversion, with the kind of dirty jokes involving kids that don't really make it into movies much anymore.

Revisit: Stroszek

An Anchor Bay release 1976

Written & Directed by Werner Herzog

In Berlin, an alcoholic man, recently released from prison, joins his elderly friend and a prostitute in a determined dream to leave Germany and seek a better life in Wisconsin.

Herzog's second masterpiece with muse Bruno S., Stroszek is a deconstruction of the American Dream as it is confronted by reality, and (as always!) the inability to communicate. Bruno expects riches when he comes to the states, but he finds his girlfriend is still a whore and no one can understand him, nor he understand them. The film is sad, beautiful, and hilarious. Typical Herzog firing at all cylinders. A must see.

SPOILER: THIS IS THE FAMOUS ENDING SEQUENCE, WHICH IS GODDAMN AMAZING

Revisit: Phantom of the Paradise

A 20th Century Fox release 1974

Written & Directed by Brian De Palma

Music by Paul Williams

A disfigured musician sells his soul for the woman he loves so that she will perform his music.



Silly, surreal, insane, dumb, infectious and hilarious, Brian De Palma's 1974 gothic rock opera Phantom of the Paradise is deliciously absurd, and one of my favorite films. Starring the beautiful Jessica Harper (best known from another one of my favorites, Suspiria) and legendary Muppets/Carpenters songwriter Paul Williams, the film is basically a suped-up, drugged up, 70's version of Phantom of the Opera.

The first time I watched this I was quite infuriated; I had no idea what was going on, what the point of it was, why the characters were breaking out into such awful songs. By the end of my first viewing, I was hooked. The film has a 'so bad it's good' quality to it, until you realize that it's actually a work of genius. The off-beat music, the ridiculous costumes, the absurd humor -- it all works together to form this highly energetic, completely insane film that can never be duplicated.

I have a particular fondness for this film, and I know not everyone enjoys it as much as I do. But give it a shot -- you may find it delightfully entertaining.

Revisit: The Grand

An Anchor Bay release 2007

Directed by Zak Penn

Written by Zak Penn & Matt Bierman

An improvisational comedy using a handful of actors playing characters competing in an actual poker tournament.



This movie is terrible. Not funny, not interesting, really dumb and lame. All sorts of bad.

Worst of all, they somehow convinced Werner Herzog to be in it, playing a German stereotype. I don't know if he needed the money to fund his next trip into the jungle or what, but poor Herzog. He provides the only real amusement, but at what cost?

According to IMDB, "The script was barely 29 pages long. Zak Penn had the actors improvise." Basically a bunch of actors did it as a favor for their writer/director pals and just decided to dick around. They probably had some fun making it, too. But it ain't no fun to watch. Seriously -- don't watch this crap.

Review: Revolutionary Road

A Paramount Vantage release 2008

Directed by Sam Mendes

Written by Justin Haythe
Based on the novel by Richard Yates

A young couple living in a Connecticut suburb during the mid-1950s struggle to come to terms with their personal problems while trying to raise their two children.



This talky drama often feels more like a play than a film, but considering the talent of all involved that's not necessarily a bad thing. Leonardo DiCaprio, Kate Winslet, and Kathy Bates reunite for the first time in ten years since 1998's Titanic in this stirring drama, deftly handled by Winselt's husband and Oscar winner Sam Mendes (American Beauty, Road to Perdition).

The script is a little overt at times -- there's a lot of yelling about 'dissatisfaction' and 'this empty/hopeless/bleak life' -- but the performers have such natural chemistry and talent that they manage to elevate some of the more leaden dialogue into something more honest and heart-wrenching. Particularly impressive is veteran stage actor and Bug star Michael Shannon, who's electric, albeit brief turn as the so considered 'insane' son of Kathy Bates literally tears the screen apart. This is some of the finest acting you'll see all year, and it's a shame Shannon's screen time is so brief, or he'd be a shoo-in Oscar contender.

What struck me most about this film was the amount of humor it managed to wring out of such bleak, serious material. I'm not talking inappropriate laughs, either -- there were some genuinely humorous moments in this film. A lot of this can be attributed to the talented performers, who create real people with real struggles, rather than stage performances or succumb to their star qualities.

The film is, ultimately, a condemnation of American conformity in the 1950's. Another reason for some of the weightiness of the dialogue is that the film begins with a couple already past their breaking point. April's acting aspirations are revealed and cut down immediately in the opening scenes -- from here on out we are meant to understand her sacrifice to Frank and their suburban lifestyle. Frank, on the other hand, has no real aspirations of his own, and so his inability to look beyond the life they've already established is a natural track. Doing the minimum to get by at work without developing any alternative self, Frank finds himself earning a promotion -- a damning hypocrisy of the American workplace -- in contrast with April's taking concrete steps to accomplish their move to Paris. When that plan falls through, April becomes distraught, disillusioned, and broken -- the American dream is dead.

Winslet won a Golden Globe for her performance and is the front runner tapped for this year's Oscar -- much deserved. The film is carried by the actor's performances and hers is an especially difficult role. It's a crying shame to me that Mr. Shannon isn't receiving the same sort of accolades, but the mere fact that he can hold his weight with such heavy hitters shows a lot of promise for the future.

While not the best film of the year, or even the best condemnation of American conformity put to celluloid, Revolutionary Road is a good film, one worth seeking out if only for the performances. It also really makes me want to read the book by Richard Yates -- anything that makes me want to read I figure is a good thing.

Revisit: Heavy Metal

A Columbia Pictures release 1981

Directed by Gerald Potterton

Written by Daniel Goldberg & Len Blum, based on the short stories of various authors

A glowing orb terrorizes a young girl with a collection of stories of dark fantasy, eroticism and horror.



A sci-fi snuff film wrapped in colorful kid's clothing, Heavy Metal is about as silly as pulp stories can get. Crossing film noir with science fiction, erotica, action thriller, fantasy and grunt war genres, it's a hodge-podge of adolescent testosterone with a kick ass soundtrack.

The animation is circa 80's Bakshi style, back when studios still believed (somewhat) that there was an adult audience for such things. Crude but colorful, I actually prefer this style to the current CGI kick. I don't think I've seen so much animated sex in my life -- it actually gets kind of awkward -- and a lot of the stories are complete schlock, but it's pretty entertaining nonetheless. No doubt aided by the awesome soundtrack, which features some killer tunes by Black Sabbath, Blue Oyster Cult, Devo, Nazareth, among others.

Interesting production note: Ivan Reitman produced, with Harold Ramis, Eugene Levy & John Candy doing multiple character voices.

Revisit: Ghostbusters

A Columbia Pictures release 1984

Directed by Ivan Reitman

Written by Harold Ramis & Dan Aykroyd

Three unemployed parapsychology professors set up shop as a unique ghost removal service.



Ghostbusters is a classic, but it's always felt like one of those franchises that never really lived up to it's potential. The sequel is basically a rehash of the first, and while the cartoon was entertaining, the animation is barely passable by today's standards. Don't even get me started on Extreme Ghostbusters... extreme my ass.

What surprised me the most in revisiting this film is how paper thin the script is. The movie basically coasts by on the chemistry of its affable lead actors and the silliness of fake technical jargon. The special effects are spotty and the story is lose and ridiculous. But it's still wildly imaginative and entertaining, even after all these years.

Ghostbusters could seriously benefit from a revamp, assuming they don't go all Apatow and cast Seth Rogan and McLovin in it. They could do some crazy ghost effects and the possibilities within the concept are essentially endless. Here's to hoping Bill Murray gets his shit together and decides to don the old power pack for another go.

Revisit: Uwe Boll's Postal

A Vivendi Entertainment release 2008

Directed by Uwe Boll

Written by Uwe Boll & Bryan C. Knight

In the ironically named city of Paradise, a recently laid-off loser teams up with his cult-leading uncle to steal a peculiar bounty of riches from their local amusement park; somehow, the recently arrived Taliban have a similar focus, but a far more sinister intent.



Postal is easily one of the most crass, vile, despicable, idiotic, offensive, piece of shit movies I have ever seen. Written & directed by the über-awful Uwe Boll (unanimously considered and self-proclaimed worst filmmaker alive today), the film aims for every bottom barrel, low-blow, everything-but-the-kitchen-sink kind of joke imaginable, punctuated by random outbursts of extreme violence. Targets of comedy include terrorists, obese women, blacks, Jews, President Bush, welfare recipients, hippies, 9-11, Osama Bin Ladin, movie executives, conspiracy theorists, American corporations -- you name it, if it can somehow be twisted into something offensive or violent, it's in there.

To give you a sense of what I mean, here's the opening sequence:



For some reason Dave Foley gives a pretty damn good performance in the film and shows his cock for at least five minutes. Poor Dave Foley.

While the movie is pretty goddamn awful, it's much more well made than any of Boll's previous efforts -- the lighting is well done, edits relatively smooth, and effects surprisingly... effective. All in all I didn't mind watching it because: 1) it didn't hurt my eyes and 2) I was pretty damn stoned. I even chuckled a bit at some parts. After all, I'm a crass man, and I like crass humor. But still, it amazes me that this film even made it past the scripting level. It's really that vile and tactless.

I'm sure this film will slowly but surely develop a small cult following and one day be considered by a select group to be a work of idle genius. Some people just like really stupid shit. To be fair, it does have the trimmings of a cult film. But it also lacks any sort of dignity or redeeming value, short of its tasteless jokes. For the overly curious only.



Yeah, fuck you too, buddy...

Revisit: Ratatouille

A Pixar film 2007

Directed by Brad Bird & Jan Pinkava

Written by Brad Bird & Jan Pinkava & Jim Capobianco

Remy is a young rat in the French countryside who arrives in Paris, only to find out that his cooking idol is dead. When he makes an unusual alliance with a restaurant's new garbage boy, the culinary and personal adventures begin despite Remy's family's skepticism and the rat-hating world of humans.



It took me over a year to sit down and watch Ratatouille because I have my reservations about Pixar. I tend to find their animation technically impressive, but flat and disinteresting, especially the color schemes (very purple and yellow), character designs, and all too fluid movement. Likewise the writing, while tightly wound, is often very formulaic, safe, and soft. The films hit the right beats, but all too well. For a company that puts so much individual care into each of their films, they sure seem to churn them out conveyor belt style. Not too mention most of the anthropomorphized characters could easily be substituted for humans and not much would change.

After watching, I still don't understand why this film was so well received. The animation is flat and bubble-like, the story has the same elements as every other Pixar film (an anthropomorphized animal is 'different' from the pack, gets separated, is sad about being lost but learns to love it, etc etc), and the humor is so safe it's practically non-existent. This is a kids movie -- Pixar only makes kids movies, let's be clear -- but where's the adventure? Where's the edge? Where is anything interesting? Why am I watching this?

Technically I am impressed -- don't get me wrong, the amount of tiny detail that gets its due is impressive -- but ultimately the film is unsatisfying. I really wish Pixar would grow a pair and make a goddamn movie worth watching. I still haven't seen Wall-E so maybe my feelings will change after that, but nothings done it for me yet...

Revisit: Street Trash

A Synapse Films release 1987

Directed by J. Michael Muro

Written by Roy Frumpkes & J. Michael Muro

When a liquor store owner finds a case of "Viper" in his cellar, he decides to sell it to the local hobos at one dollar a bottle, unaware the drink causes its consumers to melt. Two homeless lads find themselves up against the effects of the toxic brew, as well as a Vietnam vet with sociopathic tendencies, and the owner of the junkyard they live in.



This inane horror-comedy is one of the dirtiest, grossest, grungiest things I've ever seen. If you're a fan of splatter flicks it's a must see. People explode, they melt into piles of goo, one guy even gets his dick ripped off. It's disgusting. And great.

The plot isn't important -- you could even watch it with the sound off, but I guess you'd lose some of those nasty sound effects. There is some commentary on post-Vietnam vets and their quality of life -- a great scene at night in the dump with a ranting vet and a terrifying pan shot stands out -- but you're not watching this flick for the social commentary. You're watching it for the blood.



Here are most of the great scenes. There's another one of these on youtube somewhere. I highly recommend seeking this out if you're a splatter fan but the casual movie goer might want to stay away, especially if you're squeamish.

Revisit: Murder By Death

A Columbia Pictures release 1976

Directed by Robert Moore

Written by Neil Simon

Five famous literary detectives and their sidekicks are invited to a bizarre mansion to solve an even stranger mystery.



This screwball detective story takes jabs at some of the literary (and film) world's most popular crime-solving characters. Full of fast wordplay, puns, slapstick and absurdities, the humor is fairly antiquated (especially the Chinaman jokes), as are many of the spoofs -- in a few generations I doubt any one will get all the Thin Man or Charlie Chan references -- but it's all kept light and breezy and in good fun, and the talented cast helps give it legs of it's own. What other screwball comedy can boast a cast comprised almost entirely of Oscar winners and nominees? The flick has David Niven, Maggie Smith, Peter Sellars, Alec Guinness, Estelle Winwood, James Cromwell, Eileen Brennan, Elsa Lanchester -- all of whom were nominated or won an Oscar in their careers. Not too mention it features Truman Capote in his first and only screen role.

But the star of the show is Peter Falk. His Sam Diamond - the hard headed, fast talking, trigger happy take on the classic Sam Spade character from noir detective stories - has all the best dialogue, and the best delivery. He even manages to upstage Peter Sellars, which is pretty incredible. Some quotes:

Sam Diamond: The last time that I trusted a dame was in Paris in 1940. She said she was going out to get a bottle of wine. Two hours later, the Germans marched into France.

Sam Diamond: Why don't you push her wheelchair down the driveway? We got business here!

Sam Diamond: Wouldn't you know, out of gas.
Tess Skeffington: I saw a station about five miles back, Sam.
Sam Diamond: [hands her a gas can] I want you to know I'm gonna be waitin' for ya, baby

Dick Charleston: Another diversion. He gives us meaningless clues to confuse us, dangles red herrings before our eyes, bedazzles us with bizarre banalities, while all the time precious seconds are ticking away towards a truly terrible murder still to come.
Sam Diamond: You're good, Charleston. You're not my kind of cop, but you're smart and you smell good. You're not a pansy, I know that, but what the hell are ya?
Dick Charleston: Classy, I suppose.

Sam Diamond: Shut up, all of ya's. Nobody move!
Dick Charleston: What is it?
Sam Diamond: I have to go to the can again. I don't wanna miss nothin'.

All classic. His mysogionisty insecurities provide some of the heartiest laughs, and are probably the most likley to translate in years to come. Falk's range is really incredible.



Worth a view if you're a fan of old literary detective stories, Clue, or older styles of comedy they just don't seem to make any more. Also, Peter Falk. God bless that man.

Review: Zack & Miri Make a Porno

A Weinstein Company release 2008

Written & Directed by Kevin Smith

Lifelong platonic friends Zack (Seth Rogan) and Miri (Elizabeth Banks) look to solve their respective cash-flow problems by making an adult film together.



You would think that crafting a painfully by-the-numbers romance story line would allow plenty of wiggle room for jokes. Not the case with Zack & Miri, which may go on record for being the most predictable romantic comedy disguised as raunch to come out in ages.

Zack and Miri are platonic best friends and are both broke. So when a video of Miri in some questionable attire becomes an internet sensation, of course it's only logical that they film a porno together to collect some quick cash.

Only, that doesn't make sense at all. And what follows is a trajectory of the most predictable kind: they have sex and realize they love each other, things get awkward for a moment, but it all works out.



Now a person could probably figure all that out from the trailer - it's called 'convention' for a reason. But assuming that is the template, what makes a movie standout is how it goes about utilizing that template. In this case, raunchy, disgusting, hilarious jokes.

Only there weren't many. There were lots of slow reaction shots of Seth Rogan and Elizabeth Banks. Lots of really awkward conversation scenes about whether they were/weren't in love. But very few jokes. The funniest parts of the film came from the performances - namely Craig Robinson & Justin Long - and weren't derived from the scenes or set pieces.

Say what you will about Kevin Smith - self-aggrandizing, talentless, fat - his films characterized my youth. Growing up in Jersey, they spoke to me and many others at a very young age, and showed us that all you needed to make a movie was a simple, clever set up and some good dialogue.

Well, Zack & Miri doesn't have any good dialogue. It's not witty, nor clever, nor does it even make much sense. The performances are mildly amusing, but none of the actors are in top form. I simply can't recommend seeing it.

Top Movies of 2007

My favorite films of the year thus far:





























And there are still many more I have to see... Things may change after voting for this year's Independent Spirit Awards begins.

Here's this year's NYC Screening Room dates

Revisit: Trust

A Fine Line Features release 1990

Written & Directed by Hal Hartley

A pregnant teen (Adrienne Shelly) meets a moody genius (Martin Donovan) with a hand grenade.



Hal Hartley's satirical view of suburban drama is arbitrary, but interesting none-the-less; a soap-opera world of absurdisms stuck in a Long Island vacuum, where things just happen. Roger Ebert once wrote "when a Hartley film plays on TV, you won't be tempted to go channel-surfing because the movie will seem to be switching programming for you", and it's true, but that's not necessarily a bad thing. Trust has just enough American-indie, dysfunctional family quirk to keep it from feeling manufactured; considering the time of its release, it's probably more responsible for influencing the modern commodified indie backlash. The film is a ball of ideas, some work and some don't, but they all seem to point towards the fucked-up-ness of east coast suburban living, a theme Hartley has dealt with his entire career. The performances here are amusingly dead-pan, and the colors drab. If you like your hopeless romanticism with a bit of restraint, this film is for you.

Review: The Simpsons Movie

A 20th Century Fox film 2007

Directed by David Silverman

Writing Credits:

James L. Brooks screenplay
Joel Cohen consultant writer
John Frink consultant writer
Matt Groening screenplay
Al Jean screenplay
Tim Long consultant writer
Ian Maxtone-Graham screenplay
George Meyer screenplay
David Mirkin screenplay
Michael Price consultant writer
Mike Reiss screenplay
Mike Scully screenplay
Matt Selman screenplay
John Swartzwelder screenplay
Jon Vitti screenplay

After polluting the local lake, resulting in Springfield being put under a giant government instituted glass dome, Homer must simultaneously save the town and his marriage.



Those of you who read this site may have noticed that I haven't written a review of a new film in quite a long time. That's because I haven't been to the theaters in over two months. That's right - two whole months have passed since I've been compelled to go to my favorite place on Earth, the movie theater, and watch a film. I've been so fed up with the crap that Hollywood has churned out this summer that I simply decided to boycott pretty much every movie that has been released. Sequel after sequel, revised franchise to remake, I couldn't stand to sit through any of them.

But The Simpsons was something I had to see. Eighteen years in the making, The Simpsons Movie was something that was always on the tips of everyone's tongue, but seemed like it would never happen; a mythical idea that looked great on paper but could never be done. Like most of my generation, I grew up watching The Simpsons, and just couldn't picture a jump onto the big screen that would do the show justice.

So when the movie finally landed - to rave reviews, nonetheless - I had to see it. I went in with the best of expectations: that it would undoubtedly disappoint, but if there were two or three good jokes, I'd be happy. And I'm glad to say that the film not only met those expectations, but exceeded them. The Simpsons Movie is about as good of a film one could ask for from a show that seemed to have run its course almost a decade ago.

Without side-stepping the legacy that they've already built, Groening and Co. have managed to craft a fast paced, funny, cinematic counterpart to the show that retains its spot-on portrait of the American family. While some might complain that the satire isn't as biting as, say, South Park: Bigger, Longer, & Uncut, the film somehow manages to make its points clear while staying fresh. After all, The Simpsons was never really about controversy, at least not in the same way as South Park, but the dives it takes at religion and American life are still quite funny while aimed at an incredibly wide audience; I saw the flick with my whole family, and my parents laughed just as hard as I did.

Ultimately the film is a bit short and maybe too fast paced for its own good - it's a bit top heavy and starts to lose steam towards the last act - but I have to say I was impressed. Was it worth the eighteen year wait? No - but it didn't ruin the show in any way, and was certainly an improvement upon the last couple of seasons. If anything, it reminded me of why I liked The Simpsons so much to begin with, and that's certainly a good thing.